Keeping population in view and the time and effort it requires to raise a kid , most of the people are going for one kid per family nowadays .Even my brother and bhabhi are happy raising my 3 year old nephew .It’s been 3 wonderful but hectic years in my family . Everytime I call home , something or the other is going with Tanuj( my darling nephew). Many important decisions in family are based on him , from family outings to bhabhi’s college to choice of sofa covers( light colours are out till he grows up) to bringing home some furniture or artefacts (they shouldn’t have edges)to the kind of food is being cooked and list is endless .
He is given all attention and time , there is no hush hush to his questions. Everyone takes pain and effort to explain him simple things in life .It took him a day to understand that his Grand father is my father and his father my brother,when I appeared out of nowhere after a year, but nobody lost patience . As it’s not safe nowadays to send your kids to the neighbours to play , everyone take turns to keep him entertained. I was startled when mummy once said that he has an imaginary friend ‘Panuj’, with whom he plays and talks. Is he craving for his own age company, a friend a sibling??? May be ..
Things would change when he will be in school, he will find friends there , but what if he will long for a sister or a brother when he will see other friends talking about their brothers and sisters. My family is quite sure they don’t want another kid , and I respect that .I totally go crazy handling him for 1 hour. But, when I remember my childhood, it’s so beautiful because of the relation I had with my brother. We grew up like best friends, we still are .He is just 1 and half year younger to me , so we played and fought together ,shared secrets and sometimes even friends. The only pic I took while leaving home is a pic of me holding him in my lap when I was 3 year old and he of 1 and half.
At the same time , my mom was a home maker and bhabhi is still studying and intent to work from next year, and my mom is done with her share of raising children . I strongly believe grand-parents are there to lend a helping hand and not doing half of parenting .A child is sole responsibility of his/ her parent’s .So the decision should also be theirs. I cannot see myself raising two kids ( I am not even talking of giving birth here ), so I can understand what’s in bhabhi’s mind. Yet, something about single kid in a family bothers me.
Email: Feeling Trapped - An email from a reader: please read and share – have you been in a similar situation, if so, what was your experience? what you would suggest to the letter...
1 week ago